Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Drowning Charlotte...

It was, I know, a dastardly deed that I did today. But, you see, I couldn't help myself. I just couldn't!

I killed Charlotte. Yes, I did it and I have no regrets, sorry to say to those arachnid lovers who might be around, although I think they are pretty much few and far between in number aren't they?

I was in the bathroom, undressing to get into the shower. I had already placed my clean clothes that I planned to wear to my monthly lunch group meeting with some of my high school classmates on the top of a cabinet in the bathroom and had my pjs and robe also laying there. I turned to finish undressing and what I saw then caused me to let out an audible gasp.

There, laying on top of my nice white, very plush bathrobe was a spider -a pretty darned good-sized one and a black one at that!

Surely this must be one of those very poisonous black widow spiders I thought.

Then I thought but how the heck am I going to get rid of it as obviously it was still alive and healthy -even though it wasn't moving.

Spiders and I are not friends. Not. In. The. Least!

Normally, my move would be to stomp on it but unfortunately, my leg sure as heck wouldn't allow me to lift it up that high to begin with and that too would probably leave some marks or some kind of residue on my lovely robe, wouldn't it?

How to get rid of this ugly thing then?

I grabbed a fistful of toilet paper, all bunched up and bravely reached over and snagged that spider in the folds of the toilet paper.

Pulling my arm back, I looked down at Charlotte and saw she was wiggling about a bit as I then very quietly dropped the bunch of toilet paper -holding Miss Charlotte firmly in there -into the commode and pulled the lever to flush.

I watched as Charlotte tried in vain to swim out but to no avail. However, she was apparently a better swimmer than I had judged her to be as when the commode had refilled the bowl, I noticed she was still there and still swimming too!

Curses!

Pull that lever down once again and this time, I watched as this was one spout she wasn't going to survive going down and coming back to haunt me ever again!

And that my friends is how I ended Miss Charlotte's life in her web today!

And I can enter my bathroom again now with the peace of mind that at least there is one less spider roaming around my house tonight!

Did I mention how much I hate spiders?

Well, now you know, don't you?

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