Keeping the Fingers Busy

You all know by now that I am pretty much addicted to embroidery work, don't you? For the past two years now -a little over that, actually -I almost always have some type of embroidery project I am working on.

Today is no different as I am currently working on yet another tabletopper. But, in the past two weeks, I have completed two more toppers and I thought I'd share pictures of them with you today.

First is this one -
When I purchased this kit, I had thought it would make for a nice tabletopper to show on my Etsy.com account (whenever I finally get it set up, that is) but I had some problems with my stitching and the diagram of the pattern and as a result, felt it has a few too many mistakes on it to warrant offering it for sale.

However, as it turned out, when I completed it, Mandy said she was really relieved that I wasn't going to post it for sale because she wanted it for her. Problem solved then, huh?

Now, I realize my tabletoppers and tablecloths that I do here are hand crafted stuff and certainly don't qualify as being in the same category as something by Matouk but the other tabletopper -the one I completed late this past Thursday night -well this one is definitely going to be donated to the Crafts Sale unit at the Bazaar the Women's Group at our church (Holy Trinity Lutheran Church in Lanse, PA) will be having on November 6th.
I really liked the way this one turned out, for sure, and I think they can probably charge between $40 and $50 for it at the Bazaar. What do you think about that?

Last year, I donated two tabletoppers to our bazaar -both sold for $35 each and I even got orders for 2 others like them too after the bazaar -and this one is fairly intricate in the detail and stitching involved so I think they should be able to get a good price for it then too.

Well, I sure am hoping that's what happens with it anyway. So if you like it and are interested in it, just come to our Bazaar on November 6th and you can purchase it there then!

Fallout!

Sometimes, things happen here that create a bit of backlash or fallout and sometimes, they are somewhat expected but with the kids, one never know what might cause a bit of turmoil.

Take Kurtis this morning. He seemed fine and dandy when he first woke up and came downstairs. Sweet, smiling, pleasant and in a good humor.

But in record time, his demeanor changed and he was whining and crying about something to us but unfortunately, when he gets in that mood, that frame of mind, he frequently shoves his hand into his mouth -or over his mouth -so even if he is saying things that under other circumstances would be easy to understand, we often then can't get a freaking clue as to what has him in tears.

At one point, it was because Mandy went down to the basement because she was doing some laundry and for some reason or other, he didn't want her to leave his sight. Then, when it came time for him to get dressed for school, he must not have liked his mother's initial choice of outfits but eventually, she did come up with pair of jeans and a shirt that suited his fancy or his mood -whatever!

Who'd have thought that for a 4-year-old as well as his almost 7-year-old sister, that wardrobe was as important as it is to them! Miss Maya is quite the diva at times when it comes to what clothes she wants to wear. And, if an outfit is chosen that doesn't meet her fancy, she gets really agitated and very loud about what she does or does not want to wear! Enough so that there are times when thoughts of running away from home can easily enter into the mind of the adult trying to cajole her into getting dressed!

Sometimes, there is fallout here too that affects mainly the adults in the household and right now, I'm the one mainly feeling that stuff in my life.

I've been, I think, quite fortunate in that with my first chemo treatment a little over two weeks ago, that I haven't had any major issues with it -no nausea and not even feeling tired or run down. Not as yet, anyway. I am hoping the remaining treatments deal with me as kindly as the first one did.

However, I am now beginning to see fallout from that treatment. True fallout, as a matter of fact it is!

Tuesday, when I combed my hair that morning, I called Mandy back to the bathroom to show her the fallout there!

In my hand I held a great big fistful of hair that just seconds before had been where it was supposed to be -firmly attached to my scalp! I had her check to see if she saw any bald spots in the back starting to show up. She said no, not yet, just thinning!

Yesterday and again today, there's been more and more hair ending up in the brush -or so it seems -than is left on my head. Well, not quite that much I suppose but sure does seem like a whole lot that's coming out!

My son is going to be leaving the area with his job and will be going to the panhandle of Texas to work for about a month. He's not yet sure which day he and his work unit will be leaving -either tomorrow or Saturday -and they will be on a bus for a long trip from here to Texas. (I think he said it is about a 35 hour trip which, as long as he and his co-workers take the bus being provided to the new worksite, they will get paid for those hours spent on the bus! I think that's a pretty neat way to add a whole lot of hours to one's time card in a pay period, don't you?

But anyway, when he was down last night for supper, I mentioned to him that when he gets back home from this work stint in Texas, there probably will be a very big change in my appearance as the expected hair loss from the chemo was now in full swing.

He said then that I shouldn't be surprised too then when he comes down here tonight for supper by his appearance because he probably will be bald then too!

Seven years ago, when I was first diagnosed with the colo-rectal cancer and was to receive radiation and chemo, plus surgery, then more chemo, he came home that first weekend after my initial diagnosis and he was bald. Yes, he had shaved his head in what he called and empathy move for me and my treatments. However, the chemo I received back then did not cause any hair loss and so, when I had told my doctor what my son had done, he laughed like crazy because he said that in three months, I would still have a full head of hair but Sonny Boy, well he would still be bald then!

This time though, the type of chemo I am getting WILL cause the hair to fall out and if my son does follow through with the idea or game plan of shaving his head, we can then later go out in public -if we so desire -as the bald-headed mother/son duo, can't we?

I think I'm gonna loan him one of the turbans I have here -in anticipation of the hair loss -cause winter's gonna be setting in here shortly and I'd hate to think of him (or myself for that matter) getting a frostbitten scalp, ya know!

I am wondering though how Kurtis will react or respond to me once I become the "Hairless Grammy!"

Hope that doesn't create a lot of other fallout with him as sometimes he gets frightened by the strangest and the littlest of things, ya know!

Worth a Thousand Word

It's been said that a picture is worth a thousand words, right?

Well, one day last week, Kurtis pulled a number on me that had me thinking later that I should have whipped my camera out but, in retrospect, I suppose I'm better off that I didn't do that.

He and I were here -just the two of us. I don't recall now where Mandy had gone but anyway, it was my responsibility that day to get him dressed, ready for school and on the van. It was a bit early to get him dressed right then for school but I was busy with something or other at the computer and had told him to take his pajamas off and his pull-up -something he can usually do by himself - and to get a clean pair of "unnywears" out of his drawer in the bathroom.

I mentioned to him that once he did that, he could bring the clothes over to me that his mother had brought down and laid out on the radiator for me to dress him. Apparently, he misunderstood me because he went upstairs and came down with a whole 'nother outfit -not one his Mom would have approved of either as it was a bit mis-matched -so I told him -again then -to go take his pjs off and put his underwear on and then, I'd help him get dressed.

The next thing I knew, he was standing beside me and he was stark naked! But he was standing with his back to me and he gave ME instructions then too -"Scratch back, is itchy!" and with that, he began kind of squirming around to indicate where on his back I should be scratching him.

As I said, later I thought about how comical and cute he was with giving out his orders to me and gee, it would have been really cute had I taken a picture of this naked little guy's backside.

But then I thought too, what if one of these days Mandy maybe decides to get one of those digital frames and that photo might somehow then end up in the array that would or could be flashed off and on? Maybe that would only be cute to those of us who live here and a stranger, even a friend, coming into the house and perhaps seeing that might not see the cuteness of such a pose.

But ya know, I think if we ever do get one of those things, we each have more than enough other really great pictures of both the kids -fully clothed too -that we could definitely put one of those units to darned good use!

A Pretty Good Clean Up!

Well, in case you weren't already aware of this -if you're on my Facebook, I'm pretty sure you were though -today was my birthday. Yep. I'm now a whole 'nother year older and it came about all in the space between midnight last night and well, midnight tonight. (Which by the way, is just around the corner too now as I write this post.

It's really been a pretty incredible week this week, not just the past 24 plus hours.

Mandy's friend's husband came up with the idea that the week of one's birthday should be more important and that we should celebrate the "Birthday Week" as opposed to just the day. So last Sunday, Mandy -being the little smarty-pants that she can be some times -posted on Facebook that this was my Birthday Week and as a result, I've been receiving birthday greetings off and on all week but today -well, today was a massive influx of birthday message that came my way!

Just incredible, awesome and truthfully -just a bit overwhelming too! So to all those who wished me a happy birthday during the week or today, thank you all so much for doing that as the wishes and added messages on many were very much appreciated.

So, what did I do exciting for my birthday anyway?

Well, yesterday I cooked up this casserole concoction I had improvised about two years ago -using bite-size pieces of boneless chicken breast, browned with some chopped onion, a bit of chopped garlic, two jalapeno peppers finely chopped up too and some chopped celery. A whole lot of chopping going on, ya know. And to that mixture I then added about 2 cups of chicken broth and oh -I almost forgot -I also chopped up some carrots to this mixture too. A dash of seasonings of various types and let that simmer a while. Then, I cooked a package of penne pasta and made some homemade white cheese sauce using shredded white cheddar and shredded mozzarella, and mixed the creamy sauce with the chicken and then poured it all over the penne pasta and presto magic, a really tasty and easy too, casserole that easily fed the whole family with some leftover of it that Carrie took a container home with her and Clate took the rest home with him so he would be able to have a good hot meal for his supper tonight when he finally arrived back home from work!

While we were eating last night, grandson Alex was busily scarfing down this masterpiece on his plate and finally, lifted his head and told me "Hey, this stuff is really good, Gram."

And as soon as he said that, Kurtis picked up the chant then as he looked up and me and said "Is real good Gram" too! Now he may have just been parroting his cousin Alex -cause Kurtis does do that -a lot -but considering the way he too was attacking this food on his plate, I was inclined to think he actually meant those words. So I took that as the ultimate compliment, coming from a little boy who does love pasta of most any kind but can still be more than a bit picky some nights about eating that or anything some days, for that matter.

After we finished supper and gave the casserole a little time to begin digesting, we then enjoyed a great Dairy Queen Ice Cream Cake and man, was it ever good too!

As I was cutting the "cake" the family decided that was the time to sing Happy Birthday to me -one of Kurt's all-time favorite songs - and he was so excited over getting to sing this and also, was so very much anticipating getting a hunk of this yummy ice cream cake too, he was jumping all around the kitchen island, singing his little heart out and arms flapping away like crazy too.

And wouldn't you just know it but we forgot to get the camera out and try to get a video of the singing an dancing going on too! What a bummer, cause both the little kids were very excited as well as being really cute and comical too.

Then, today -Miss Mandy took her Momma to lunch, at the restaurant of my choice and I choose to go to the 1921 Restaurant at the Hotel Philips in Philipsburg, PA.

This was the second time I've been lucky enough to dine at this lovely establishment and for Mandy, it was her first visit there but we were both very impressed with the foods we ordered and came away from pretty darned well-fed then too! Yeah, Mandy's purse was a good bit lighter after our lunch too but she figured it was well worth it since we had a great meal, a lot of good old-fashioned enjoyment of each other's company without the presence of two small beings that we normally would have to keep carping at to sit up, shut up and eat, ya know!

Before we left for the restaurant though, we had a visit from one of my very good friends -for well over 50 years now -from our church as Margie brought a container of freshly made homemade chicken noodle soup -made too with homemade noodles! And wow, that made for a great light supper tonight -which was good -because after eating that great lunch, I sure didn't feel the least bit inspired to cook anything really and this soup definitely hit the spot.

Mandy and I were chuckling though at lunch because both of us were dressed considerably different than the way we normally look if we go out to eat at one of the little local places here. She was laughing that the folks where she works wouldn't recognize her because although she was all dressed up real fancy, she had opted for a pair of nice sandals instead of her traditional flip-flops and her sweater was one of her better sweaters as were her slacks but the defining thing for her was that she had even actually combed her hair! I had decided too that I would dress a little nicer for the occasion with some good dress slacks, a sweater (short-sleeved) and a floral blazer that had flowers in it of the same color as the sweater I had chosen to wear plus, I had heels on too -which is something rarely seen on my feet these days.

Both Mandy and I lean to much more casual clothing most of the time. We both tend to like t-shirts and shorts or jeans and we both also like to wear nfl t shirts too in recognition of our favorite football teams. She prefers the Steelers and I do like that team but my own team is those good old Washington Redskins!

Thinking about our normal wardrobe choices, Mandy laughed and said "Hey Mom! Ya know, we do clean up pretty darned nicely!"


Also before we left the house, I got a phone call too from my cousin Ruth Ann -who lives way down south in Austin, Texs -and she was calling to wish me a very happy birthday.

And that's not all either!

When we came home from lunch, Mandy discovered a container of flowers on our front stoop but there was nothing with them to indicate who had brought them and placed them there. These were a bunch of pink and/or pink and white verigated flowers, sort of resembling Sweet William, plus a big branch that was in a glass jar filled with water -obviously some sort of plant that someone was trying to get it to root and had brought here to give these plants to me.

I had no idea where the flowers had come from until we got inside the house and then I saw a book laying on the table with a card on top of it and I recognized the handwriting on the envelope. I laughed and told Mandy that I was now pretty sure who had brought the flowers and left them and also the book. I figured it was my good friend and neighbor -practically forever -Kate! So I phoned her and asked if she might just happen to be the local flower and book fairy and she laughed as she 'fessed up to having brought the plants and the book and card up while Mandy and I were out.

This evening then, Kate's sister, Shirley, stopped by bearing gifts too! She brought me something she knew I would love and appreciate too -a set of pillowcases, all stamped and ready and waiting now for me to get around to doing the embroidery of them!

Oh and in between all that, when Maya's TSS - Miss Amanda -showed up today, she had a nice little gift bag and card for me too! From Miss Amanda I got a nice big coffee mug that says "Grandmother" on one side and on the other side, a message that becomes visible when you pour a hot liquid of your choice into the mug! It says "What happens and Grandma's, stays at Grandma's!" (Wonder how she knew that I love coffee mugs though? Hmmm. I'm thinking it's because she's one very observant young lady!)

Last evening, my cousin Nancy phoned me too -around 10 p.m. -which was pre-arranged for her to call about that time as I knew by then the kids would be in bed, fast asleep and the house would be quiet enough that I'd easily then be able to hear what Nancy had to say with now problems. And we had a great conversation then too -remembering all kinds of things about our grandparents, aunts, uncles, other cousins and events that we share common interest in covering the past 60 plus years too. We also compared notes a bit too about the chemo stuff since she -like me -is also receiving chemo treatments now too. It was such a good conversation that it went on for a little over two hours as it was just past midnight when we hung up the phone.

And tonight, about 8 p.m., I received yet another phone call and this one was a big, big blast from my past! It was the guy who for several years while I worked at AccuWeather had been my supervisor there! He and his wife had left the area I think about 10-12 years ago now and moved to the Minneapolis area. But hearing Scottie's voice was so great after so many years! The only drawback when he called was that the kids were still awake plus Kate and Shirley were here then too so I had to tell him, if he'll be home tomorrow or Sunday evening, I'll return the call to him then because I really want the opportunity to be able to sit and chat with him!

And that's pretty much how my birthday week evolved down to my actual birthday and it was one that was one of the best, most memorable that I've had in a long, long time!

And now that I think of it, I think Nick-Nick maybe is on to something too that when we have our birthday it should be celebrated for the entire week!

Works for me, that's for sure!

B.B.B.B. Bad!

If you follow along with me on Facebook, you may have noticed a post my dear daughter, Mandy, put up there on Sunday. She reminded me -and a whole bunch of FB friends too -that this is my "Birthday Week." Yeah -like I really needed the reminder huh that come Friday I will add another year to my age.

Actually, I'm pretty happy about the fact that I'll be another year older cause in my book, it beats the Hell out of the alternative, ya know. I'm pretty proud of the fact that I will have had 66 years on the face of this earth, had so many wonderful, excellent experiences too -that I have a family of three children who are the best, three grandchildren who are beautiful beyond compare and extended family of cousins and more cousins and even adding more in that line all the time too.

And I have family I've never seen in person in all corners of the world, who I most likely will never come even remotely close too meeting -ever -either, and many of those folks communicate with me from time to time via this medium called blogging and often, their words come at just the right moment in time to keep my spirits from dragging, to keep me lifted up and moving ahead!

I just finished clearing out my reader this morning -all 101 posts that were there waiting for me to come by and read them -and one of those posts today (actually two in particular) really spoke to me, loud and clearly! So because of that, I'm gonna give you a heads up, a pointer in this direction and tell you to go read these posts today if you don't do anything else and see if it doesn't help you put a very positive spin on things today -maybe for the rest of the week and heck, who knows, maybe even for the rest of your life too!

I'm recommending these for your reading pleasure - Suldog is one of my favorite bloggers and, if you've never read his posts but you read this one, I think you'll share my enthusiasm for his "stuff" too. And my other recommendation for today is this one from Kat at Seeking Sanity. Tell me if you don't find a good bit of inspiration in the words both of them have in these posts, please!

Now on to a few other things in my life of late.

I'm pretty sure I mentioned over the weekend in my posts that I had a little problem on Saturday with my trusty little old jeep -in that it wouldn't fire up and run for me Saturday evening. Thanks to my good neighbor across the street and his jump-starter thing-a-ma-jig, we got it up and running and my son had listened to me explain what happened and figured that the buggy probably needed a new battery but if that didn't cure the problem then it might be in need of an alternator. Daughter Mandy went out Saturday night and brought home a new battery for my jeep -my birthday present, just a few days early. Sunday the battery was put in, jeep was running okay -or so we thought (or hoped, anyway.)

Monday a.m., I had an appointment at the Cancer Center for my weekly bloodwork and got a big disappointment though when I hopped into the jeep and turned the key to get -nothing! Hmmm. Back into the house to tell Mandy I wasn't going to be getting over for my blood work just yet. So she hurried and got shoes and socks on Kurtis -who was already dressed and ready for school because he had his weekly play therapy appointment later that morning. And off we went then in her car and I got to Clearfield only about 10 minutes late for my blood work but got it done, all the same.

After that -with an hour between then and Kurt's appointment, we decided to have breakfast at Arby's so Mandy and I could feast on their breakfast bar buffet. Not that it is a gourmet treat but for a fast -food place, they did a fairly decent job on the fluffy scrambled eggs and home fries that had grilled onions cooked in with them too, just the way I like 'em but lots of places manage to screw them up. So I was happy. But what really made my day was that they had biscuits -nice big biscuits and some really good sausage gravy to pour over those biscuits too!

Now I love biscuits and sausage gravy! I've kind of been dreaming of eating that treat for sometime now but kept putting off making the sausage gravy because the kids won't touch it with a ten-foot pole, ya know. Sometimes, I do believe these two have no tastebuds at all -leastways not for any of the good stuff that I love anyway! So I did -I confess -make a bit of a pig of myself as I went back for seconds on the biscuit and gravy thing and yeah, did sort of feel the rest of the day that I was toting a bit of a small rock in the pit of my stomach but no heartburn, no indigestion and I satisfied that craving so what's a little rocky feeling then? Nothing in the grand scheme of things in my book.

After our dining experience, we set off to take Kurt to his therapy appointment. One nice thing about riding in Mandy's car is that she has a radio in her car that actually works as opposed to the radio, cd player, etc., in my jeep that won't play a single thing these days. And she had a station on that was playing pretty much rock stuff -which is fine with me as long as it isn't the Heavy metal or rap stuff. And this song came on the radio - Bad to the Bone -which ended up causing us both to crack up laughing.

Why? Well because half-way through the song we heard Kurtis in the back seat singing away to the music. What really had us howling was his version - B B B B Bad bone! Yep! Just too doggone cute for words, reallyit was!

Last night was the monthly meeting of the Women's Group (WELCA -Women of the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America) at our church and I had to be there because our President just left town a day or two ago for a big vacation trip to Russia and, since I am Vice President, I had to be there to well, preside, ya know. Probably wasn't one of the most organized meetings the group has ever seen but we got a few things done, planned for, etc.

One of the things we got done though was that we completed putting together Health Kits which will be distributed to people around the world who have virtually nothing in the way of material possessions.

As we were putting these kits together -which consist of a small hand towel, a wash cloth, bar of soap, comb, nail clippers or nail file, toothbrush and six bandaid wrapped within a rubber band -the plight of whoever would be the recipient of this little health kit.

Comparing my own needs and wants and properties I have within my reach at any given time to being someone who would be receiving one of the Health Kits really put my life in a completely different perspective.

No matter how gray or dark any given day in my lifetime -of almost 66 years now -may have seemed to me at any point in time, never, ever have I been in want, in need, of the simple basics of life, of existence! And to think that so many people do not have even these things that seem to me -probably to you too -to be basics of life so easy to reach for and use -well, it sure gave me a whole lot more appreciation for the things I do have at all times too, within my house!

That, plus thinking about this small group of women from our church who gather to plan and coordinate and serve the parish in so many ways -giving of time, giving of money, giving of food, giving of simple things like prayers for family and friends of members who are ailing and the comfort that those things provide within our community and beyond -makes me so grateful to be a part of this sisterhood. Because of the group having aided me when Mandy and I went to Pittsburgh for my surgery, I had looked for a thank you card to give the group and the one I selected, initially I thought maybe it really was inappropriate because it was one of those musical cards ya know and I thought perhaps the group wouldn't follow my thought process with this particular card. It was pretty simple actually -just a big "thank you" and a message about "sisterhood" with the song "We are family" playing. But that is how I've always felt about my church, about my fellow members of this parish and particularly since I got involved in the Women's Group that they are "my Family!"

This morning now, Mandy woke me up as she was taking Maya to the bus stop because as soon as she got back home she was leaving to take her car to the garage where her uncle works as a mechanic to get her gas tank repaired. I needed to be up and awake then to watch over Kurtis, need to hurry and finish writing this now too so I can find his shoes and socks and get them on him, get his jacket -throw some clothes on myself too (besides my jammies) so I can take him out to get him on his van when it arrives to pick him up and take him to his school.

And, he's been very good for me -watching his programs that he likes on the tv and I thought I'd see too if I could wheedle him into maybe eating a little something too.

So, I offered him what I figured would be a good item -a nice treat to his tastebuds -in the form of a toasted blueberry bagel complete with cream cheese and butter on it too! He was excited about the bagel -sure he was. Until I put it in front of him and then he took his index finger and proceeded to slick off all the cream cheese, squeeze the bagel to kind of mangle it up a good bit and walk away and leave that then on the plate on the table.

With last night's meeting still in my mind, those health kits, thinking of people with nothing ya know, it was more than I could bear to then trash the remainder of that bagel.

No -I didn't need those calories -for sure -but also, I couldn't bear the thought of wasting them either.

Rituals

We have a lot of rituals around our house. It's not all that unusual, as any parent or grandparent (or sibling for that matter) will tell you if there is someone in the family who has autism, rituals often become part and parcel of the way life runs in that home.

Some folks might call paying particular attention to some of the quirky things the kids here -my grandchildren -do, as another means of spoiling them --letting them have their way with respect to some of this stuff.

Maya has obsessions from time to time. We don't usually mention when she has a doctor or dental appointment at the time the appointment is made (which could be six months from now, as you know how doctor appointments go) because if we tell her right when we know her appointment will be, she will obsess over the date. Actually, that means more than likely she will talk -and talk -and then talk till she is virtually blue in the face -about this appointment. It's not because she has a fear of these things because for a child her age, she handles doctor and dental visits quite nicely. Unlike how her aunt would have been, or for that matter, her Grandmother too, she no longer exhibits any signs of fear when she has to see the doctor or the dentist. (My Mom would have to drag me kicking and screaming all the way to any appointment like that!) Kurtis too is fairly calm these days about appointments like these but if we were to tell him a month in advance he's going to see the doctor or dentist on such and such a day, it would be like telling him to look outside and see the sun shining. Not something he really pays any attention to there.

He does have his quirks though -things he is terrified of seeing, of being around. One of them was this fake shark my son had that he hung in the corner near his "bar" in his house and for several months, Kurtis wouldn't go near that area because he was just plain petrified of this fake shark. Eventually, his Dad got him to calm down considerably about this item -mainly by telling him "It's just pretend" and having him tell himself that, over and over again.

It's the same thing too with respect to a Halloween mask that Mandy and I bought about two years ago that is really an ugly old man's face, with a balding head but with long, gray, stringy hair falling from the middle of the back of the head down about to shoulder length of whoever might wear this thing.

Back when we first bought this mask (we got it mainly for my son because it's the kind of thing he would love to prank people with, particularly around Halloween) both the kids were terrified of this mask. Eventually, Maya got over her fear of it but not Kurtis. Even after I moved it to the top rear shelf in one corner of my bedroom where it is not even visible at all, Kurtis was so frightened by that mask that he wouldn't go into my bedroom and for that matter, if my bedroom door would happen to be open and we were trying to get Kurtis to go out the front door (requires passing by my bedroom door) he would scream bloody murder until the door to my room was firmly closed.

Eventually we figured out though why he was so scared of this mask.

Seems his sister knew the mask was in my room -and also, where it was stashed away too -and she took great pleasure in telling her little brother that the mask is the "boogie man" and the "Boogie man" of course, is in Gram's bedroom!

Lately, both the kids have been chattering a lot about the upcoming big event -Halloween -and Maya, especially, has been going on and on about what she's going to be for Trick or Treating as well as for the Halloween parade and party in her class at school. Kurtis has been jabbering about Halloween too, even talking about what he wants to be which for a while was that he was going to be the "Boogie Man." Hmmm. How he figured he'd pull that one off was one for the books since almost all masks tend to do him in with respect to the fear levels.

But tonight, Mandy and the kids had gone shopping in State College for the express purpose of looking for Halloween costumes for both of them. Maya is a happy little clam since she came home with a cheerleader's outfit and she's going to be a Miss America cheerleader in her very patriotic looking red, white and blue skirt and top set!

Kurtis came home happy too with a special hat. A hard-plastic race car driver's helmet type hat! Mandy was half afraid that once she got it home and out of the plastic container holding it, that he would have a hissy fit and not let her put the hat on him but lo and behold, he put it on and was running around the house like a proud little peacock with his race driver's hat!

The kids have their little quirks and obsessions too particularly about food items. New foods do not become part of the staple fare in our house without a whole lot of exposure and coddling, bribery too, to get them to just take a tiny taste and then, if that works, start bit by bit trying to get them to take a bite, chew it and swallow! They will both now -finally -usually eat mashed potatoes but it's still not a guaranteed thing -not like say, Mac'n'cheese is. But if they will accept a helping of mashed potatoes, don't you dare even think about ever putting gravy on top of that -not for either kid!

Sometimes I do wonder if they really are related to me at all, ya know! When I was a kid, mashed potatoes and gravy - and plenty of both -were high on my favorite foods list, for sure!

But you know, when I think back to some of my quirks as a child when it came to food, I realize now that I really was obnoxious and about drove my Mom and my Grandmother too darned near nuts. My main thing at the dinner table was if either of those two women in my life was setting up a plate for me, if they put any item on the plate and it somehow touched something else in the food line, I immediately threw a hissy fit that could rival any meltdown either of my grandkids might decide to pitch! And heaven forbid that they give me a spoonful of lima beans, or a touch of coleslaw and whatever you do, if you were putting jelly on a slice of toast for me, DO NOT give me grape jelly!

Yeah -fixations I had which over time became rituals at the dinner table too.

But, considering the fact that for many, many years now, I have happily accepted helpings of lima beans, coleslaw and love grape jelly, I'm not going to get too hyper over the food rituals of Maya and Kurtis. As long as they eat enough that they aren't going hungry, I figure eventually their ideas about the foods they turn their nose up at now will make their way some day, further down the line, into their stomachs!

Lately though, I've been trying to teach Kurtis to say his prayers when he's all ready to go to bed. I just feel this is important to start him learning about God and faith and prayers and the time is now, in my opinion. (I tried doing this with Maya too but after about a week or two, she flat out refused then -and still does -to learn to say her prayers. (Although I have noticed she watches me with Kurtis very closely as we say his prayers now.

We have the simple little evening prayer -"Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. If I should live for other days, I pray the Lord to guide my ways. Amen!" And when that is finished, we do "God Blesses" where I name as many of the various people who are a part of his life and he repeats that person's name then.

This little ritual is now getting ingrained in him I'm pleased to say. At night now, after his bath and in his pajamas, he will come to me and hops up in my lap, snuggles against my chest and announces to me "I say prayers now."

And so we say them then -together -and he is very content the whole time we do this. Inevitably, immediately after, he either snuggles in a bit more, closes his eyes and poof -like magic -he's off into dreamland or sometimes, he only snuggles with me a couple minutes and then goes over to the sofa and with his special "bear-bear" in hand, curls up in a ball and falls asleep.

Now that's the kind of ritual I really like!

Cold Morning and Rib-Sticker Breakfast

Yep. It must have been pretty doggone nippy this a.m. when Miss Mandy woke up cause when I got up, the furnace was running and the radiators were nice and toasty hot! Mandy refuses to run the furnace unless her teeth are chattering so the rest of us have to wear layer upon layer of clothes in order to get warm.

But since it was that chilly out this a.m., I decided it was time to fix a nice hot breakfast of some good old fashioned oatmeal that would warm the kids -and me -from the inside out. Hey! I need all the darned help I can get to get warm and stay warm too, don't 'cha know?

So I made us a batch of oatmeal -complete the way my kids always liked it -with brown sugar and butter mixed in it. I also put an added touch to our oatmeal today by taking a couple of dates and thin slicing them into the oatmeal too.

Mmmmmm, VERY Good!

Well, initially it looked like Maya and I were gonna be the only ones who would appreciate this yummy breakfast as Kurtis didn't like the idea of oatmeal at all -apparently -and when he saw those tiny brown bits in it, he really pitched a hissy fit.

"Take out! Take out!" he yelled at me while pointing to those teensy bits of dates!

I wasn't really in the mood to contend with his snippy food moods this a.m. and I told him, quite forcefully, to "sit up, shut up and eat -with no whining!" And, as to the dates -well I lied and told them that was just little tiny pieces of brown sugar.

No, I have no qualms whatsoever about lying to my grandchildren -especially in issues where food, safety and my sanity at an early morning hour are concerned.

Eventually, he did stir the oatmeal around a bit, got it fairly well cooled down so as not to burn his tongue and did a pretty decent job -at least as far as Kurtis is concerned -with eating about half of the oatmeal in his bowl.

I'll take his eating that much -including getting a couple tastes too of the dates -as a successful breakfast! Wouldn't you?

A "Pick Me Upper" Day!

Today was definitely what I would have to term as a day full of "pick-me-ups!"

In many ways, this week -from Tuesday on thru today -has been one with many "pick-me-uppers" for me.

First there was the chemo treatment on Tuesday which, this time, went with nary a hitch, not a glitch in sight. The nurse accessed the port easily, virtually painlessly and the infusion was so smooth I slept through most of it! Can't beat that with a stick, now can ya?

Wednesday, I had to go back to the cancer clinic to get a shot of neuplasta (I think that's the name of it) to make sure my white cells continue to make more of the same. I think that's the closest explanation I can give for the need for this injection. Anyway, the nurse had told me that this shot would most likely make me achy, make me feel kind of like I was coming down with the flu, ya know, but guess what? Even with all the rain we had this week -which generally really sets my joints afire and aching -I had no problems along those lines whatsoever from that injection.

Pretty smooth sailing there, don't 'cha think?

I've been plugging away all week, working on my latest tabletopper project and making pretty good progress on that too. Even though I was a little ticked off initially because the directions for the stitching of this big old star didn't match the stamping on the fabric 100% so some of my stitching there was well, shall we say, sort of "ad lib?" It doesn't look horrible, but I'm not happy with it cause I know it has errors and I just don't like to see that in my work. (Not that I don't make errors cause yes, I do but normally they are ones only I really know where they are and this piece, I feel, the errors on it will be visible to others looking at it too and that annoys me.

Oh well. It will still be okay for us to use as a Christmas Tabletopper here in our house -just won't be one for sale or for a gift.

Today -Saturday -was the kind of fall day I could really enjoy. Okay -a bit more sunshine would have really made it perfect, but the temps were just great -not hot, not cold -just nice in-between!

This afternoon I decided to do something I have been really lax about since the surgery though. I decided to take Sammy for a walk and to make it the kind like we'd been taking back in June and July -a nice longer walk down to Peale!

It was cool enough today that my clam diggers and a turtleneck under a nice v-neck sweater provided just enough warmth for me. (I do tend to chill a bit easier than before but nothing really drastic.)

So, about 3 p.m., Sammy and I headed down the street for Peale.

It was so nice and comfortable walking -no bright sun to bake me, no rain to soak me -just nice even temps -and the trees turning colors were so pretty, it made for a beautiful stroll for us.

I decided that I wanted to walk to this one particular curve in the road where the woods on the right-hand side clear out a bit and there is a beautiful view then overlooking the valley where Peale once was and you can see clear across to the hillside that is the area referred to around here as "Tunnelside." (Named because there is a railroad tunnel in the mountain side there.)

Anyway, as I got to that clearing, and saw the view unfold before me of the opposite mountain, I was really in awe of the beauty -how lovely the trees were, so many different shades of reds, oranges, browns, greens and yellows. Like a giant kaleidoscope of every fall color in the spectrum, ya know!

And I was planning to take a picture of this scene when I happened to notice just down the road from this spot, was a silver vehicle looking like it was in a spot where it sort of didn't belong. And in front of this vehicle was a little green Tracker that I recognized as belonging to a local guy here in town too. Then I spied the owner of the Tracker standing by his buggy and another guy walking around there too so I decided to postpone my picture taking and walk down to see what was going on where they were.

When I got to where the guys were milling around, this is what I saw!

Yep! Seems someone had driven this nice little suv off the side of the road, striking that tree you see there and pretty well wedging the vehicle in there too! Darned good thing it was pretty wedged in because to the right of the vehicle, the embankment is a bit on the sheer drop-off side for that section of the road!

So I chatted for a while with the guys and learned that the owner of the Tracker was just there waiting around with the other guy (who was the owner of the SUV) so he wouldn't have to wait out there all alone until a wrecker of roll-back came back to pull him out of his predicament.

While I was there the roll-back showed up and I tried something I thought would be really bright -like taking video of the roll-back driver hooking up to the SUV and pulling it out -but the movement of the SUV was so slow, so slight, so miniscule, that it really didn't even show up on the videos! Go figure, huh?

The poor guy with the rollback though couldn't get the SUV loose and had to contact another wrecker driver from the company where he works to come and help him and between the wrecker and the rollback, it took about 90 minutes for them to wench this SUV loose from the moorings it had taken up along side the road there!

For a ghost town such as Peale is, this was something exciting for me to see on my walk down there! Usually, all I see is the dirt road, trees and occasionally -in the summer time -some pretty flowers blooming here and there!

Needless to say, all that time spent watching them pull this SUV free ate up 2 1/2 hours of my time! So it was just past 5:30 when I got back home.

Then, I decided I didn't want to cook a meal tonight just for me, so I was going to run up to the deli at the grocery store in Kylertown and pick up some good sliced meat to make myself a yummy sub sandwich. Sounded like a good plan to me until I got in the jeep, turned the key and... nothing happened!

Darned jeep wouldn't start for me!

I knew my neighbor across the road (who is a mechanic) was out front of his house, sitting on his front steps so I walked towards his place and called out to him, "Hey Bob! Know a good mechanic around these hills?"

Bob laughed and said it sounded to him like the jeep needed a jump start so he got some kind of apparatus he has and brought it over to my place, hooked it up on the jeep and presto-magic, the darned thing fired up right away!

However, Bob told me if I was just making a short trip, he advised I not shut the engine off but rather, to let it idle and try to charge up a bit till I ran my errands and got back home.

Which then is what I did.

Meanwhile, on my way out of town, as I went past my son's house, I saw he was home so stopped there for a few minutes to talk to him, let him look over the engine on the jeep and make his assessment. He thinks it may be something as simple needed as a new battery but could also mean the alternator is going bad too. He thinks it more likely is the battery though so Mandy said she's going to get me a new battery at Walmart cause we can't go without having my jeep for me to use to get back and forth to my myriad of tests, doctor appointments and of course, more chemo looming too in the future. Cover my bases there, please!

On the way home from running my little errands, I stopped and picked up the mail and was surprised to see three things in the mail for me that were -judging by the envelope and the handwriting -some kind of cards for me.

The first one I opened was a card from one of my high school girl friends -one who usually joins us for our "monthly lunch bunch" but didn't come to our meeting this past week. And it was a birthday card -only about a week early but she said she wanted to mail it now because she and her husband are going to Virginia this week and she was afraid she'd forget about it then.

And the card was one that was really sweet -very sentimental -and yes, being the sentimental slob that I am, I confess that it brought tears to my eyes too. And it was signed "Love, Carol and Eddie too!" Carol's husband grew up two doors up the street from me, is two years my senior and is also one of the nicest men anyone would ever hope to meet. (So he and Carol make a darned good paid because Carol was always one of the sweetest girls in our class and just a great lady as a result today, don't 'cha know?)

That left these two other cards with penmanship I didn't recognize and a postmark of Phoenix, AZ -which really puzzled me at first. Until I flipped the envelope over to open it and saw the return address with the name above it that said simply "Debo Blue!"

And for those of you who have never picked up Debo Blue's blog to follow, never read any of her pieces, well if you have, then you will understand when I say that seeing her name there, there was no longer a mystery because Debo is the kind of person who would send a person a card -just to say hello, just to try to find a way if it was needed to give another person a little bit of an uplift in life. Which is exactly what those two cards she sent did for me! (She sent me both these cards because she said she couldn't make up her mind which one she liked better! Now I ask you, how sweet is that anyway?)

And now, there you have it -how my day started out today to be pretty mundane. Just a nice pleasant walk with my little dog, Sammy but ended up having a tad of excitement if you will -seeing the car get pulled out -enjoying the lovely temperatures on this early Fall day, appreciating the beauty of the woods and the fresh air from a walk of well over 2 miles plus, having a neighbor handy to get my car started for me, a visit later from my son too as he came down and made himself a big old sub sandwich too for his supper and then, the greetings from a long-time girlfriend and her husband plus the pick-me-upper cards from one of the best friends and old gal like me could have acquired via cyberspace -Debo Blue!

Definitely this day was not one cut out for any one who might be a pessimist but one for optimism only!

Gotta love "pick me uppers" don't 'cha?

A New Season....

I do believe with the change of seasons last week that now too, my "season" has begun to change as well.

After the rather surprising diagnosis stemming from my surgery back in July - going from pre-cancerous cells in the cervix which is what caused my ob/gyn doctor here to refer me to the surgeon in Pittsburgh and then, the surgery there consisting of a hysterectomy, bladder repair and full hernia repair done there and the pathology report from the hysterectomy revealed cancer of the uterus -not quite what the doctor was expecting, ya know, to the chemo attempt three weeks ago that caused a wild allergic reaction in me, but today, I went back to for what should have been my second chemo treatment but was actually my first one and boy, am I happy this evening with what transpired today.

The chemo treatment today went off without a hitch from start to finish!!!

Yay me. Yay and thank you to Dr. Pedolick and his great staff at the Yingling Cancer Center in Clearfield for being patient with me when I had the reaction three weeks ago and being thorough in the care they provided then. And today, for the care -and calming demeanor -from those around me at the Cancer center as I was a bit edgy when I went in there this morning, worrying about the possibility of having another reaction similar to the one two weeks ago or heck, maybe even worse than that.

But today, the nurse who inserted the needle -for the first time -into the port that was put in last Wednesday was so adept, so skillful, that when she told me that on the count of three she would be putting in the needle for the IV and there would be a pinch -but it was so miniscule that I barely even felt anything at all, I was highly -very highly - impressed with her ability and with the way the port eliminated all the poking and prodding with needles in my arms and hands, etc., as they had to do in the past to find a good vein to use for running an iv on me.

I have to tell you too I had a nice little lunch served compliments of the Cancer Center (and egg-McMuffin type sandwich, cream of tomato soup (my fav flavor) and vanilla pudding along with a large glass of cranberry juice to wash everything down.

It took a bit longer for the chemo to run than the nurse had predicted today. She said it should take about 2.5 hours but they started it around 10:15 a.m. and it didn't end till almost 2 p.m. for about 3 and 3/4 hours then it took start to finish. (Actually, I was there from 9 a.m. until 2 p.m. because I had to see the Doctor prior to the chemo so he could discuss the cancer, the chemo and other treatments they may have to consider in perhaps 2-3 months so I was there for a total then of 5 hours!

And I slept most of the time while the IV was running -getting caught up a bit on the sleep I didn't get last night since I kept waking up every hour or two -or so it seemed!

I go back in three weeks for another chemo treatment but will have to have blood work done every Monday from now till the chemo treatments end to keep tabs on my blood counts, T-cells and all that stuff ya know. The head cold/sinus infection is on its way out the door now too, thanks to some antibiotic my family Dr. prescribed to me yesterday to handle that and I took one of the pills they gave me to help ward off any nausea that I could experience from the chemo today too.

So now, I'm all set and raring to go here, full steam ahead and let's get this next season of my life underway now.

Maybe I should have a contest now too -to see who can predict when my hair will begin to fall out?

Think I should do that? Course that might involve a before and after photo of myself or my hair anyway and I'm not ultra-keen on having pictures around of me.

Gonna think on that idea some more but let me know your thoughts anyway.

Bring on Fall -my new motto!

D-Day Looms!

Well, here I sit, playing on the computer and I really need to shut down here shortly and go to bed because I have to be at the lovely cancer clinic, bright and early, to get set for what is supposed to now be my first chemo treatment in this fight. I have to be there at 9 a.m. and those of you who have followed my blog for any length of time now know that I am not an "early riser." Not much of a morning person at all, truth be told so a 9 a.m. start time is like a killer thing to my way of thinking and to my body too, for sure!

It's events like this that almost make me wish the only thing I needed to clear this all up would be some good acne creams and everything would then just be fine and dandy -hunky-dorie, ya know!

But, sorry to say, it ain't quite that way, is it?

But, I now have the port put in that is supposed to make administering the chemo easier for me. At least this means they shouldn't have to poke and prod my arms, spending oodles of time hunting for a vein to access to inject the stuff in there anyway. So I'm thinking that is progress, isn't it?

And today, after an appointment with my family doctor at which time she informed me I now also have to make an appointment with a heart doctor, probably to have a not-so-lovely stress test too, and then, after that, I had an appointment this afternoon to have some kind of scan -a "muggy" scan? -or some such like that. It's a nuclear scan of the heart in which they inject some kind of dye and some radioactive stuff and then, they watch to see how the heart muscles squeeze and contract to push the blood throughout the body. (Only took them five tries to get a vein today! The port wouldn't be accessible for this particular test as it wouldn't have allowed the tech person to view the heart in action so we had to deal with the yucky veins that love to hide from people wanting to inject a needle and other stuff in me! Not a fun time, trust me on that one!)

But anyway -that's what's gonna be taking place here tomorrow. Film at 11 tomorrow night -if I make it back home safe and sound that is!

Yes, I am gonna be okay. You keep telling me that over and over and I keep saying that to myself too so it's gotta be true.

Don't 'cha think?

A Long, Long Week!

Yes, it's been that here -again!

A long, long week and by the looks of things, my weeks ahead keep getting longer and longer with more and more things packed into them too!

It's been over a week since my last post and I've thought from time to time of topics to post about but have been feeling more than a bit overwhelmed too of late and therefore, somehow, just never got around to doing anything on the computer besides checking e-mail and responding where necessary, surfing my Facebook and keeping -or trying to -my Reader fairly up-to-date and cleared out.

Anything else took precedence over the time necessary to sit and actually write a post!

Why?

Well, for openers, the medical community here has pretty much taken control over my life, that's why?

Over the past two weeks, it seems every time I turn around and find five minutes of free time, some doctor has decided to usurp that little smidgen of time by requiring my presence for an appointment, for blood work, or for more tests and even taking up a whole day this past week by having me confined to the out-patient surgical area for the bulk of the day on Wednesday!

And let me tell you, this stuff is getting old -like me -and doing it just about as quickly as I am aging too.

Next week does look like it might hold a little bit of promise though as right now, I only have three appointments on two different days. Monday a.m., I have a checkup with my family doctor followed that afternoon by some kind of scan (with dye inserted) of the heart. I think -if I heard them correctly -this one is called a Mug scan and is a test I've never even heard of before.

Then on Tuesday, my day will be lost as they will try -again -to run the first chemo treatment on me using the new port that was inserted in my upper chest this past Wednesday. And even if the treatment goes off without a hitch, because the chemo I will be receiving takes at least 3 1/2 hours to run through, that will take up the bulk of my time on Tuesday anyway! Just can't seem to get a break here, ya know!

One other minor detail too pertaining to the blogging scene. I have close to 200 blogs that I either subscribe to on my reader or that I follow and which then, if there is a new post done to any of them, they show up on my Reader. That's a lot of work to try to keep the Reader up-to-date and cleared out just in the reading portion there. But to comment on each blog post I've read -well, that's just plain impossible to begin with and this week, it's been made even more difficult for me because unless the blogger uses Wordpress to compose the post, I am currently unable to leave any comments to other blogs because for whatever reason, I get this lovely 503 ERROR message left behind when I try to comment on Blogs that are on Blogger or Blogspot! Now that is really frustrating to me to get that error because it is just that much more time that has then just been wasted!

Just wanted to let those of you know why I haven't commented on your posts if you are using either Blogger or Blogspot and if so, you also know too how much response one gets when you try to register a complaint/problem to either of those entities too. Like NONE! Pretty much the norm there is to just read, sit back and wait until they might eventually get around to seeing what the problem is and getting it resolved. (Remember about 18 months or so back I had issues with this thing called "Feeds" and logged a complaint/problem question about it to BLogger and I'm still waiting for an answer to that problem! Yes, I did get things fixed but no thanks to Blogger for getting it all worked out and even then, that took me well over six months to resolve anyway!)

So, besides being busy running back and forth to all these doctor/test appointments and such, I did manage though to complete yet another tabletopper and this morning, I did manage to remember to take a couple of pictures of this latest creation too. They aren't the best pictures -for sure -but anyway, use your imagination and visualize them as having much better lighting available on a couple of these pics anyway!

Here's one -with the lousy lighting factor -in which I tried to get Maya and Kurtis to help me showcase this tabletopper. Well, at least the kids are cute, aren't they?
Here's the Christmas Trees Tabletopper shown on the table -not the best picture either but at least the fabric looks white -which is what it is -instead of looking a bit yellowish on the photo above this one.
And here's a closeup then of one corner of the tabletopper that is sort of decent I guess. By the way, see those red ribbons on the tree -holding up the ornaments? Those little suckers took almost as much time to embroider as did the whole tree and the ornaments! Talk about boring -and frustrating -and time sucking!

But anyway -this project is now completed and I'm about 1/3 of the way through doing yet another Christmas themed tabletopper now.

Now that leaves me with the one family related job I have here in the household -cooking supper for the grandkids, Mandy and me and that job has now been extended somewhat too.

My son took a new job -started it yesterday with a day of training which consisted of watching videos of the work he and other new employees will be doing as they work for the gas/oil company currently working in this region, clearing out woodlands, laying down cable and such for testing for the company. He began the actual job then this morning -having to report for work at 6:45 and be transported then out to the forest to start the manual labor process that will keep his scrawny butt busy, busy, till about 6-7 p.m. tonight and he will get back home then somewhere between 8 and 9 p.m.

How, you ask, does his new job affect me? Well, because he won't get paid for close to a month and of course, he is stone-cold broke right now, that means Mandy, his older sister and I will be helping him wherever we can with money to keep gas in his truck to get back and forth to work for openers. And, because of the type of work he'll be doing -outdoors, no restaurants to go to for a quick coffee or for a lunch break, he'll have to pack a lunch. And, also, because he's (as mentioned above) currently stone-cold broke, that means that I will be trying to figure out meals every day for our supper that will also provide enough to feed him when he finally returns home from work AND also, that might possible leave something too that he can then pack in his lunch pail to take with him for the next day's work so he won't starve to death waiting for that first paycheck!

Ah, the joys of motherhood just never end, do they?

No, I don't mind fixing the extra food to feed him -actually I do like doing that. But trying to figure out what to fix that will cover an extra mouth times twice (lunch too, ya know) and that the kids will also eat so I don't then have to fix a separate meal for them too at the same time, there's the rub, ya know! Last night worked out fairly well in that I made meatloaf -which the kids surprised me by actually tasting that and then eating the portion I gave them too (a miracle, in itself, that was!) and it provided enough leftover meatloaf then that my son was able to fix a sandwich of it to carry for his lunch today.

What the heck to fix tonight though -now there's a quandry so I'm gonna have to free up a bit more time now to surf the recipe sites I have bookmarked on the computer and try to find something to cook for tonight that will work as part of his "brown-bagger" special then for tomorrow.

And so it will go forward from that point now. Any suggestions you might have for easy to cook meals that can then be packed in a bag for the next day sure would be welcome about now!

Anything that will give me a little more time then too so I can still work on the tabletopper I'm currently embroidering and get that puppy done then toO!

Isn't it wonderful being kept busy, busy, busy though?

Planning Ahead

I've mentioned this before in the past I know and it's something I'm still kind of mentally working on, dealing with as it were -the weight thing, that is.

I've lost 25 pounds now since last December when my doctor told me I needed to get a grip on this issue in my life. Not a huge amount of weight loss there, I know, but as you know too if you recall, I attribute this small but still significant amount of weight loss to simply walking my dog, Sammy!

And, that's been a good thing -for him as well as for me -to get out, to walk even just a very short distance as well as some walks that we have made that have been pretty long ones too. And yes, I have, as a general rule, enjoyed that little bit of exercise and especially the difference it's made in my body too as it's helped me to drop a size or two in the clothing department too.

Now though, I do have to figure out how to regroup on the weight/food intake issues though. The walking, while it's a darned good thing to do, isn't going to be adequate in the months to come for my body's needs.

I wish there were some really simple solution that I could just go to a website, like maybe www.getdietsolutions.com and get all the information I need there in one click of a button.

However, things -like diets and such -never come and land in our laps that easily, do they?

I need to work on the intake to my system of things like carbs and fats and try to get my blood sugar stabilized all the while, making sure that I am giving myself a very healthy meal plan too that will keep my system functioning properly on ALL levels too once the chemotherapy actually begins, ya know. And that ain't gonna be a really easy proposition to deal with there but it's one I do have to work on, to plan my meals better and in doing that, also work on my grocery shopping lists too so that I make sure I have plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables on hand to keep the good vitamins, minerals and all that flowing properly and that in turn, will make sure then to keep things flowing -properly -within my body as well!

I just need to keep better track of what I ingest and how beneficial those things are to me. That's all!

Right?

Well, sounds like a reasonable enough game plan to me -at least today. But then, who knows too what tomorrow will bring into my mind, huh?

In Perspective

I know I've mentioned here -on numerous occasions -lots of things about my two little grandchildren. Things they do, say, the logic (if any) existing behind some of their words and antics that Mandy and I have either seen as comical or at times, downright frustrating too.

Both the kids have a good strong, healthy -probably TOO healthy at times -stubborn streak that rises up and confounds us at times. Sometimes, the things they choose to get pigheaded about are downright comical though at the time and yet, are things we have to confront the kids about too because we don't want these thing to keep re-occurring either.

The other morning, Mandy was trying to get Kurtis to get dressed and ready to go to his pre-school program. Seemed like a fairly innocuous procedure and one not likely to erupt into any kind of meltdown as he generally is fairly cooperative about these things -unlike his sister, who often turns into a mega diva if the clothes Mandy has in mind on a particular day don't meet with her color or style fancy of the moment.

But on this particular morning, Kurtis apparently decided it was his day to be obstinate -and bossy too.

Mandy had just finished folding up several loads of clean clothes, ready to take them upstairs to be put away but figured she would just select an outfit from the clothes basket downstairs for him. However, he had different -way different ideas -and stood by the door to the stairway, pointing upstairs and yelling to her, "You go! NOW! Upstairs and get clothes!"

What? Hmmmm. Little boy has no comprehension, really, about one immovable object meeting head-on with another one, equally stubborn -such as his mother can be and especially so when it is a 4-year-old shouting out these directives, ya know!

But, once stubborn little boy meets up, again and again, with one very stubborn Mommy, I do believe, eventually (hopefully sooner than later) he will learn not to mess with her!

And today, he tried the same tactic but different topic to become "little boss man" here. This morning he was a tad upset because we had the Today Show on the tv and he was insisting she should change over to the cartoon channel. Nope. Not gonna happen, little guy! So he started to throw a bit of a hissy fit and she told him if he wanted to watch cartoons, he could go up to his room and watch them there, on the tv the kids have in their room. Unfortunately, he had decided to do that would be "Yucky!" She reminded him if the cartoons would be yucky on the tv upstairs, they would also be yucky on the tv in the living room too and for a change, he decided, quite quickly as a matter of fact, that this was a non-issue item after all and dropped the ideas he'd had immediately. I love it when he sees the light like that, ya know. So much more peaceful than his sister would have been as she'd have made this a life or death issue, for sure! LOL

Today's gonna be another busy day for me now -two doctor appointments this afternoon. One is to have a needle biopsy of the thyroid done over in the Imaging Department at the hospital and the other is what the Cancer Center nurses call a "Meet and Greet" appointment with the surgeon they all pretty much unanimously told me was the best surgeon around for putting in ports for patients. (Ports, if you don't know about this, are an IV hook-up type thing, inserted just under the skin to make it easier for nurses to extract blood or run ivs on patients who, like me, are considered to be "hard sticks" patients with veins that don't like to cooperate and be found or veins that just don't respond well to these things. The first appointment doesn't sound like a fun thing -exactly -to me but I'm sure I've weathered worse or near as worse than this in my life and I've lived to tell about it so will just soldier on about that one. The other -the "meet and greet" -just a necessity so that doctor can get me worked into his surgical schedule in the very near future, ya know.

And while I'm talking now about the medical stuff a bit, and because my mind often wanders about and thinks of all kinds of weirdness -or so it seems -these days, here's something that popped into my head too.

If chemotherapy -certain forms of it anyway -cause hair loss, I wonder if chemo can also make something like say chin acne disappear too? Maybe it could be like killing two birds with one stone, ya know? Well, I don't know but you know what else?

I'm not gonna worry about it anyway!

Worry -or Not?

More thinking, more -a whole lot more -procrastinating going on here of late. Lots of questions in my mind, very few answers forthcoming though. Yeah, that's been my state, my frame of mind, a lot these past couple of days.

Some folks who know me (or have known me in the past and are no longer with me) tend to think I'm a bit daft because of some of my methodologies I've often employed. There was a little old lady in our church who I used to drive to some of her medical appointments a few years back and this lady just about worried herself to death. She worried constantly about everything and anything and she used to question me on how I could manage to NOT worry about this stuff.

I would tell her that my theory about worrying, at least then (and I'm trying to get myself fully back on this track now too) was that if I begin to think about stuff and then to worry about it all too, all I'm doing then is making myself majorly depressed and sick too and neither was something I wanted to deal with. Therefore, I tried to put as much as possible in a little compartment in the back of my brain that was labeled "Things not to worry about!"

And now, I feel like I've kind of fallen off that wagon a bit and I have to get back on it and get myself, my system, my mind, on a more even keel so I'm taking things -whether they be real issues or ones that could maybe someday be an issue of a sort, and trying to put them in that mental compartment whenever stuff crops up and deem them as non-worrying items.

For an example, right now -since a certain teenager no longer resides here with us, one of the things I feel I can put in that mental compartment and not worry about for, hopefully, a goodly number of years from now, is acne treatment products. At my age, it's a non-issue and Mandy's never had problems along those lines and the grandkids -well, right now, it's a non-issue with them too.

So I guess it's a safe thing to put in that compartment in my brain then, isn't it?

And I'm going to keep moving along with this method of stashing things into a non-thinking place and thus, eliminate all kinds of petty little things along with maybe some bigger thoughts too that I can't or just don't want to contemplate at this point in time.

Kind of like the theory I used to hold about housework and how I could go off and do all kinds of other things while the house might look like it was ready to walk away from being a big old mess. But I used to tell myself that unless my fairy housecleaning godmother came by while I was out or busy doing something else, the mess would be there, waiting for me, when I came back and felt like dealing with it. And you know what, it was always there, waiting for my return too!

And so will these things that pop in and out of my pea-brain more so than ever it seems these days.

Eventually, it will all come out in the wash and things will right themselves, one way or another.

My theory and I'm sticking to it too!

Ruminating....

This is something I've been doing a lot of lately and by the looks of things, will be doing a whole lot more of it too in days to come.

Ruminating.

According to the Thesaurus, there are a couple different meanings behind this word. One is that it is chewing, gnawing or other variations along those lines and others say it means to think, to contemplate, study, brood and lots of other explanations like that.

For me, it the thinking, the contemplation aspect that I'm utilizing. I'm trying to avoid the brooding parts.

And just what is it I'm contemplating anyway.

Well, suffice it to say -as an old adage goes -it's not about the price of tea in China. Well, not exactly anyway.

My life, my schedule -if you will (and if I have anything even remotely resembling a "Schedule" in my life) of late has suddenly become filled, to the brim at that, with appointments and appointments and sheesh, more appointments!

What kind of appointments? Mainly all medical at this stage although today, I do have an appointment at noon for a meeting at our church of the Social Ministry Committee of which I am supposed to be the chairperson. I'm a bit -okay, more than a bit -discombobulated today, don't have much in the way of notes as to what direction our committee is going, what is on our coming agenda or what should be there, so folks -if you are part of this committee with me at our church, please come with lots of ideas in your minds to bring up today and hopefully, I can begin to get my mind on track then a bit to try to get things going for this important part of the ministry of our church to the parishioners as well as in outreach to the community. Suggestions are definitely most welcome and especially so today as my mind is kind of in a pretty stagnant state right now.

Last week, was a zoo for me -a total unmitigated zoo! From the early morning appointment last Wednesday at the Cancer Clinic for blood work, followed by a sit-down chat with the oncologist there about the upcoming chemo treatments to the paperwork I had to fill out and the preliminary stuff before they finally -around noon -got around to putting in the iv and beginning the first chemo treatment -which, by the way, ended abruptly after about 15 minutes when my system had a tremendous reaction to the chemo and I was eventually rushed out of the clinic and taken up the hill -by ambulance -to the emergency room at the hospital where they pumped more benadryl into me to ward of more reaction to the small amount of chemo I had received. (Seems the problem was something they mix that stuff with and it was -or so they tell me -"that stuff" they mix it with that caused the reaction, not the chemo itself. So anyway, my first actual chemo treatment now has been backed down to take place in two more weeks on the 28th of this month.

But considering the fact that the day after this failed chemo treatment I came down with a pretty ferocious head cold, I'd like to think that was a power much higher than mine or my doctors too, telling me I really didn't need, didn't want to have to contend with the after effects of chemo AND a head cold, simultaneously!

And since then, head cold and all, I've been busy fielding phone calls from family -good calls they were though, with some darned good advice and information pertaining to some of the things ahead of me in my upcoming months of medical adventures.

The latter part of last week, I got a call from the nurse at the cancer clinic telling me the doctor there wants me to see about having a port put in for ease of treatment since my veins are what the nurses (and doctors) refer to as being "bad stick." This means they often have difficulty finding a vein they can access easily to either remove blood for the many weekly blood tests I have to have and also, it means it is really difficult to find a good vein then too through which to run the chemo treatments -which in this case, this go-round -apparently is a really strong variety of chemo and is pretty harsh for those people like myself then for our veins to cope with this stuff.

Always something, isn't there though?

And my dear cousin who is also going through a lot of the same stuff right now as I am phoned me on Sunday to alert me to issues one can have too with the insertion of ports that are supposed to make our lives just a tad easier over time too. Because of things that happened to her with her port, she advised me to make darned sure that whatever surgeon I have insert the port they say I should have put in is someone who has a really good track record of doing a good job with that procedure!

And since talking to her on Sunday, I now have an appointment set up for this coming Friday afternoon to "meet and greet" one of the surgeons in this area -one that the nurses all recommended resoundingly to me too as being the best in this area for putting in ports!

That appointment on Friday will follow directly on the heels of a needle biopsy I am scheduled to have done at the imaging department of our local hospital a mere two hours earlier in the day!

This past Monday, my older daughter had the day off from work so she came up here to take me to the appointment to meet with the ear/nose/throat dude at the hospital so he could review the initial scan/test done of my thyroid about 2 weeks ago and the upshot of that visit then is the upcoming needle biopsy this coming Friday.

Yesterday -that would be Tuesday -it was yet another doctor visit for me. This time it was with the doctor in charge of radiology at the cancer clinic. Because I had radiation treatments seven years ago when I was initially diagnosed with colo-rectal cancer, there's some question about how much more radiation I can have done -safely. But that visit was nice in that this doctor sat down and talked to me about the radiation issues facing me and what I might need vs what I can actually have. He also discussed a bit more in depth about the cancer itself too -explaining a little more to me than I previously had been privvy to getting.

Based on a booklet he gave me, I gather the cancer I am dealing with now is uterine cancer. Apparently too, when I had the surgery done the end of July and they did a hysterectomy -through which they discovered there was cancer in the uterus they had removed -they were unable during that surgery to remove other things they would normally take out in that type of surgery -like lymph glands in/around the uterus -by which they would have been better able then to determine the extent, breadth, width, length, etc., of which this cancer had traveled at that time within my system. If I understand our conversation properly then this means the doctors are kind of guessing now then what stage the cancer is in -stage 2 or stage 3? Well, at least so far anyway, no one has dropped the "stage 4" words on me and I take that as a somewhat positive sign.

The doctor yesterday also wants to set up an appointment for me -for sometime this week he said -for me to have a ct scan now too so he can, hopefully, ascertain that there's nothing else going on in my abdomen or anywhere else within my old body right now that will add a few more clinkers into the already near-to-being-full trashcan of medical issues ongoing at this point in time! If they are gonna schedule this test, considering they didn't get one set up for this morning, I guess that means they'll call today and tell me to come into the imaging department either Thursday morning for the ct scan or maybe, Friday a.m. and if it comes about on Friday, I can then count on spending the entire day kind of chained to the imaging department or visiting the office of the surgeon to get his take on inserting a port into me!

Ah loverly, loverly, wonnerful, wonnerful, ain't it though?

So right now, my thoughts are to the possible complications that could muck up my life a bit more if I have the suggested radiation procedures. How quickly my hair will begin to fall out after I get the first chemo in two weeks. How much the chemo is going to have an effect on my appetite, my strength, my energy levels over the coming four-to-five months when I will be getting the chemo treatments every three weeks.

And how much time too will all of this actually buy me too?

Yes, that is also in the back of my mind and keeps popping up for me to mull over as well.

Let's face facts folks -I'm willing to go forward and try to fight all this and then some, certainly I am. But at the same time, I do wonder too if these treatments that ravage -or can do that -to a person's body, will -at my age now -leave me able to pick up and enjoy life again too?

Sure we all have to eventually face the facts of life than none of us is here forever and we have no idea when that time will come when we will be called home. Like everyone else, I do have a certain amount of trepidation in that respect. I would really like to be around a lot longer to watch my grandkids grow up a bit more. Next to having had my own three children, the grandkids have been I think probably the biggest and best blessing ever to my life and I'd like to see as much more of how they appear to be turning out anyway as is possible. And yes, that is I suppose a very selfish desire on my part too, isn't it when I think about so many people I've known over the years -family, friends, acquaintances -whose lives were cut much, much shorter than mine by accident or disease and they never had near the opportunity as I've had so far to at least know my three grandkids.

I know -life as we think of it often isn't fair, is it but I think I can cope with that -a bit grudgingly maybe, but still, I will work on that on a daily basis and try to find as many ways as is possible to enjoy every thing I can in whatever time I have left -whether it be an hour, a week, months or hopefully, years -who knows!

The key as I see it in the frame of mind I am in this morning is simply to find the good in everything I can that I may encounter. This opportunity may -after all -never present itself to me in this manner, ever again and finding something good or hopefully even funny in some of the junk that likes to clutter my path these days -well, let's just say it is a challenge at times but having a challenge available still beats the hell out of the alternative doesn't it?

Peace.

Appetite? What appetite?

Mealtime around this place are often quite interesting. Suffice it to say they can also be very frustrating too though. With two kids who seem interested mainly in having either mac'n'cheese or chicken fingers for their main meal, virtually every day of the week, it can also get more than a bit boring too.

Tonight though, I had made homemade roast beef pot pie using the leftover roast beef from our supper the other day and the leftover gravy too. That, mixed with some sliced potatoes and a can of peas and carrots, all baked in a double pie crust in the big casserole dish and well, Mandy and I regarded this meal as a feast fit for a king.

Maya ate a good bit of her serving of the pot pie but because of the speed with which she dipped her fork or spoon into the food, you could tell her heart wasn't fully into this meal near as much as Mommy or Gram were. Kurtis now -well he's really a horse of a different color when it comes to mealtime, that's for sure.

Often he will say he's gonna eat this or that item I've fixed and then when you put a dabble of it on his plate for him to give it a taste test, he forgets completely about having earlier said he'd try the new food before him.

And initially, that's what I thought was going to happen tonight as he gobbled up the serving of cottage cheese Mandy had given him and he ate half of the whole wheat roll -with butter on it -that I'd fixed for him, but when push came to shove and it was time to try the pot pie, he pulled the brakes on really fast then.

At first, that is. Then I finally convinced him to just take a little taste of the crust and he did that. Lo and behold, it was darned near magical because then he started to push the serving around a bit on his plate -foraging for more pieces of the crust, ya know, and paying no mind to whether there was a bit of meat, some potato or a pea or piece of carrot and a touch of gravy accompanying that bite of pie crust.

Okay, so my success tonight lasted then roughly about 10 minutes until he had managed to find about all the pie crust he could identify as such and then, we reverted right back to seeing his stubborn streak and the flat out refusal then to eat anymore of that dish.

Oh well, I'm still gonna bask in the fact that at least he tried a new food -new to him anyway -and ate a little bit of it before letting the contrariness settle back in on him.

Now, with respect to meals here though and the problems trying to entice the kids to eat, as if that weren't enough to deal with, somehow over the coming months, I'm going to have to figure out ways to fix dishes that will entice the kids to eat some new items and also, give myself things to eat that will be nourishing, yet low in calories, sugar, carbs and fats too, that will also be fairly easy too for my system to digest.

Sometimes I think maybe the only solution for me is just to get some good old herbal phentermine and then, cook whatever the family likes to eat but just nibble at that stuff for myself then, instead of eating my normal-sized portions.

Looking at what options are going to be ahead for me kind of reminds me of the tag line William Bendix had in the old tv show, "Life of Riley" - "What a revolting development this is?"

How to get all these things to mix and blend is gonna make for one rough and rocky road ahead for me!

Dreams of Weddings, Walks, Relaxation and Healing!

I'm dreaming –again. Or maybe I should say, “As usual.”

But this time, this dream does have a bit of substance to it.

I'm dreaming of this house -

this gorgeous beach house, The Skyhawk, for an Outer Banks vacation sponsored by Carolina Designs -for a full week the last weekend of May.

I'm dreaming that I've won the chance to spend that particular week there with my family and to be able to walk down this lane to the sandy beaches,
to laze around by the beautiful pool and to just enjoy living in the lap of the luxury of this place with the lovely bedrooms, the game room and pool table, the kitchen with windows overlooking the ocean and the shore line.

Aside from the desire to be able to relax in such a tranquil setting, I have other reasons for dreaming of being able to spend a week away from central Pennsylvania during the last weekend of May too.

My daughter Mandy's former roommate and long-time good friend is getting married that weekend and her wedding is going to be where? Well on the Outer Banks of North Carolina, that's where!

So, if my dream to be able to spend that week there sightseeing along the Outer Banks, enjoying the ocean, introducing Kurtis and Maya as well as my older grandson, Alex, to the glories of the Atlantic Coast, were to come true, Mandy and I would then also have a place lined up where we could stay so we'd easily then be able to afford to make the trip down to watch our good friends, Billie Jo and Paul, tie the knot!

I have a lot of not so nice things ahead of me this fall and over the winter months. Chemotherapy and radiation, for openers. Trying to rebuild my strength and energy levels from those things, recuperating from cancer plus watching my hair grow back (hopefully in time for the May nuptials). And the opportunity to spend a week at the Skyhawk sounds like it would be just exactly what the doctor ordered.

It definitely would be a dream come true for little old me!

Good Night and God Bless

Just a little report on things in the "fast lane" here at our house.

Seems it may have been a rather opportune thing that my first chemo treatment sort of went by the wayside. Well at least in my opinion, I see it in that way.

Why? Well simply because late Thursday afternoon, I noticed my throat getting a bit scratchy and sore and the nose was starting to act up to so I had Mandy make a quick trip to Walmart for me to get some Mucinex DM and a generic cold tablet supply. So, since Thursday, my system's been in the throes of a nasty head cold and I'm so glad -relieved actually -that I didn't have to deal with the after effects of chemo along with a head cold.

Once medical dilemma at a time is fine by me!

So now, where was I heading when I started this post? What is the significance of my title, you're probably wondering.

I've been trying the past couple of months now to indoctrinate Kurtis into saying prayers every night before he goes to bed. Nothing fancy, just the good old nite-time "Now I lay me down to sleep" prayer followed by a string of God Bless this person and that one, naming all different people in his life.

Last night, he and Maya both got their bedclothes on and he'd finished off his cup of milk that we lace with the meds for his allergies and to help him sleep soundly -or relatively so at any rate -and he came to me, crawled up in my lap which he does frequently when he's ready to go to bed now.

As he snuggled up to me, I asked him if he was going to say his prayers and he said yes. So I started out, as I do with that routine, where I say a line and he repeats it after me. We went through the "Now I lay me" prayer and when we reached the end and I said "Amen" he repeated that quite resoundingly to me.

Then he spoke up saying "And Mar-Kay?" I asked him what he meant and he repeated that again and I realized he was launching off into the "God Blesses" then, on his own. The "Mar-Kay" he mentioned there is the name of Maya's bus driver.

Okay, I said, this is good. And I asked if he had others he wanted to "God Bless" and he picked right up on that. The next name he mentioned was "Passor Carrie" (Our minister, Pastor Carrie, who he loves). After that, he had a litany of others too -Miss Randi (one of his therapists), Miss Dawn (His TSS), Miss Amanda (Maya's TSS), Miss Keddi (MIss Carrie, the teacher at his pre-school), Miss Jackie (An aide at his pre-school) and then came "And Miss Grammy and Miss Maya and Miss Mommie and Miss Ken"!

I started snickering a bit when he said "Miss Grammy" but by the time he finished up with saying "And Miss Ken" I have to admit that I howled laughing then!

The "Miss Ken" is far from being a Miss at all but rather should have been called "MR Ken" but apparently Kurtis doesn't do gender differentiations just yet.

When he finished with his list, I led him through all the others we normally do in the God Blesses -Aunt Carrie, Uncle Clate, Pappy, Poppy, Great-Grandma and everyone in our large extended family gets included at the end with a simple "God bless all my other cousins" which he says as "And all my udder cousins!"

So just so everyone within all sides of my family tree -and from his Dad's side too -you all get counted in with Kurt's God Blesses in one way or another!

And with that I'm gonna end this post too with a huge God Bless from me to all my family, all my friends -be you friends I've had for life, new friends, cyberspace friends -whatever.

May God Bless!